You're Not So Bad Yourself
by MineIsAnEvilLaugh
Summary: What we all wish happened in that hotel room. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

_**Okay, this is my very first fanfic so.. be gentle, please. Read/review**_

**Disclaimer: Tragically, I don't own Castle.**

**Summary: What we all wish happened in that hotel room. **

"You're not so bad yourself, Castle." He really is ruggedly handsome… what? No he wasn't. Well, yes, he was, but she had never though of him that way. _It must be the wine, _she thought to herself. She glanced at her wineglass, and then almost did a double take. It was her first and it wasn't even half empty.

Kate looked back at Castle, trying to figure out what her emotions were doing. She looked at his face, thinking about reaching out to touch him, then shook the thought from her head. No, she told herself. This is not going to happen.

The detective looked again at her partner, at his mouth, his nose, his beautiful... baby blue… eyes… She was going to lose it. She had to get out of there.

Kate then realized how long they'd been staring at each other and quickly said, "I should go. It's late. Goodnight." She got up and began to walk to her room.

Then, from behind her came a soft "Kate-"

"Goodnight, Castle," she said, cutting him off quickly. She loved when he called her Kate, but she couldn't tell where this was going.

With one last glance back at her partner, Kate closed the bedroom door and covered her face with her hands. What the hell was that? she thought. She wanted to go back out and say something, talk to him, but she had no idea what she would say to him. She knew that Castle would wait for her to make the first move, always being the gentleman, keeping what she wanted in mind, but she didn't know if she was ready for what that move entailed.

Kate stared at the door handle, debating opening it. She finally gave into whatever her heart was telling her to do, completely ignoring her brain. She turned the handle, a small part of her hoping he was already in his room.

As the detective pushed open the door, she caught the final glimpse of Castle's back as he entered his room and shut the door. Kate stood there, silently cursing herself for not opening the door a second sooner.

She sighed heavily, running a hand over her face and through her hair, and began to turn back into her room when she heard the handle on the door across the room turn.

They stared at each other for a heartbeat, the reality of their situation crashing into them, then Kate gave in.

She closed the gap between them in three long strides and threw her arms around his neck.

She didn't wait for him to speak, didn't give him the chance. She only smiled at the uncomprehending look on his face before her mouth was on his. He tensed for a second, then wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer.

They started slow, testing each other, then the kiss became more urgent. Three years of wanting and waiting melting into one incredible kiss.

Kate began to push Castle backward, into his room, toward his bed, without breaking away from him.

"Kate, wait," he's kidding, she thought. She pushed him further back.

"Kate." he said firmly, grabbing her hips and forcing her away from him, but keeping his hands in place, tracing little circles with his thumbs. "What about Josh?"

"What?" she said. He had this sad look in his eyes, like a puppy who just got his favorite toy taken away. "Who… Damnit. Oh damnit, damnit, damnit!" She walked over to the white couch and sat down, he hands covering her face.

How could she have forgotten? Because it's Castle, she thought, closing her eyes as he sat down next to her. Because you're in lo- No. Nope. You love Josh… Right?

Kate needed to get away from Castle. She needed to run into her room, get herself together. She felt his hand on the small of her back, for nothing more than to comfort her. Instead of running away, she sighed and leaned back, into his shoulder, allowing him to put his arm around her shoulders.

Castle was silent. It was strange, he had something to say for every situation, but he also knew when to keep his mouth shut, and she was grateful for it. She needed to sort out her thoughts.

"I-" she what? "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm the one who should be apologizing."

"What?" Kate couldn't believe she was hearing this from him. "Why? You didn't do anything wrong. I'm the one who… who made it happen, I'm the one who broke the rules…"

"Yes, but I didn't stop you. I'm sorry."

"None of this was your fault, Castle," she meant it. She looked at him, then away quickly. If she looked into his eyes again, she didn't know what would happen. "I think I'm just going to go to bed." She got up, looked at him again, and then, without thinking, gave him a small peck on the cheek. "Goodnight, Rick." Kate walked away, into her room. She didn't open the door again.

It was around three in the morning and Kate hadn't slept at all. Se had an idea of what might help, but she wasn't sure if she could handle it. She went for it anyway, hoping she wasn't overdoing it.

"Hey," she said quietly when she opened the door to Castle's room. "You awake?"

"I don't think I've ever gotten less sleep." He was in the middle of the bed, staring at the ceiling. He looked like he'd been tossing and turning for the past four hours, just like her.

"Me either," Kate bit her lip.

Castle lifted his head and looked at her, then immediately shifted over to the right side of the bed.

Kate let out the breath she hadn't realized she'd holding, relieved at his ability to read her. He always knew what she wanted, but more importantly what she needed.

She walked over and slid under the covers on the left side. She snuggled close to Castle, burrowing herself deeper into the blankets. He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head.

"Goodnight, Kate."

"Night, Rick."

They both fell asleep instantly.


	2. Chapter 2

Kate knew she was dreaming. The body next to her in bed wasn't her boyfriend and he smelled like apples and the beach. She smiled to herself because she knew who the man of her dreams was, and the dreams that involved him always left her with that warm fuzzy feeling.

There was something else, though, a new sound. Clicking, maybe? Why was there clicking disturbing her dream?

Kate rolled over, groaning. Something always ruined that dream, whether it was her alarm or her phone, there was always something to pull her out of her favorite fantasy.

But then, Kate heard a soft "Good morning, detective," and her eyes shot open. She turned her head to see Richard Castle sitting in bed next to her, typing away on his laptop.

_That explains the clicking, _she thought, _but how the hell did I get into Castle's bed? _Then she remembered; their conversation, saying good night, opening the door, the kiss… Kate's stomach fluttered a bit at that part. She remembered how she couldn't sleep, so she went into Castle's room because she knew the only way she was going tot get any sleep was with her favorite writer next to her.

"Morning, she said slowly, still processing everything that happened the night before.

"I ordered room service, it should be here in a bout twenty minutes." He was still tapping nonstop on his computer.

She nodded and watched him for a moment. "So I guess the writer's block is over," Kate said.

"Yup. Inspiration came to me in the middle of the night." Castle stopped typing for a second and looked at her, making her blush,

"I uh… I think I'm gonna take a shower." Kate forced herself to get out of bed and walked across the room to the door, but before leaving she muttered "Thank you, Rick." He looked up at her with an expression on his face that could only mean one thing: _Always_.

Kate walked across the living room and into her abandoned bedroom, gathering her things for the shower but also grabbing her cell phone.

She closed the bathroom door, and then dialed a number into the phone. Kate bit her lip and tried to decide what she was going to say as she waited for an answer. Lanie picked up on the second ring.

"Hello?'

"Hey it's me."

"Well it's about damn time. What took you so long? You said you'd call when you landed. I had to hear from Javi that you were safe and sound and breaking and entering."

"Lanie-"

"And I can't believe Castle just showed up like that! I swear girl, if you don't do something soon, I'm gonna take him. Javi can learn to share.

"Lanie I-"

"And aren't you two supposed to be on your way back home? Honestly, going rouge while already going rouge is a little much, don't you think? Now, I know Royce was important to you but-"

"Lanie! I… I slept with Castle last night."

Silence. "Lanie?" More silence. Then there was another tapping sound. "Lanie, what're you doing?"

"Texting Javi and Ryan. They owe me money."

"No, Lanie, you don't get it. Nothing happened."

"Kate, you just said you finally slept with Rick Castle!"

"Yes, I _slept _with him. That's it!"

"And that's not a big deal because…?"

"Because all we did was sleep!"

That shut Lanie up. Kate bit her lip again. Then, "You have _got _to be kidding me."

Kate sighed. "I'm not. Well, there was a kiss…" Lanie squealed and Kate had a sudden flashback to high school, "But then her reminded me that I have a boyfriend."

"I'm coming out there just so I can hit him upside the head." Lanie sighed, the frustration evident in her voice. "Did you at least cuddle?"

Kate smirked. _Yup. Just like high school. _"Yeah, a little." She could almost hear Lanie's eyebrows go up, and she laughed, saying, "Okay, maybe a lot."

"Well at least something good came out of this. Now what're you going to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"Oh please, Kate. This guy has been waiting for you ever since he ended things with Gina. You can't kiss him and a spend a night cuddling and then just go back to Josh like nothing ever happened."

"I wasn't-"

"You were thinking about it."

Kate bit her lip. Lanie was right. Lanie was always right. She couldn't do that to Castle, not after everything that happened. She cared about him too much to hurt him like that. "You're right. I can't do that to him."

"Of course I'm right."

Kate rolled her eyes. "But what am I going to tell Josh?"

"Tell him the truth. Except you should probably leave out the part about how you're leaving him for Castle."

Kate smiled. "Bye, Lanie. I'll let you know when we're coming back."

"Yeah, you better. And Kate? Don't do anything drastic."

Kate laughed again and said "Bye, Lanie."

Chuckling, Lanie said "Bye, Kate."

Kate hung up her phone and started the shower. As the water was getting warm, she found herself making a mental list of the things she would say to Josh when they got back to New York. It was going to be a long and probably loud conversation, but in the end, she was pretty sure she was going to tell him to go to Haiti.


End file.
